All Blog Posts – Katie Stickney, MA, LMHC

Mar 15

Friday Friendship Tip: Don’t Neglect Your Friends For New Love

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About Friday Friendship Tips: Friendship is often overlooked in our society, dropped down the priority list below our partners, children, other family members, and even our career. We often underestimate the power of friendship as a source of encouragement, strength, and joy in our lives, yet we often feel its lack in our lives. I am frequently asked, “How can I find more friends? How can I make the friendships I do have more fulfilling?” Through this series, I will be offering small meditations that I hope will help you turn your attention toward friendship and help you to prioritize it.

Mar 08

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Friday Friendship Tip: Avoid Triangles

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Mar 01

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Friday Friendship Tips: Be Yourself

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Feb 22

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Friday Friendship Tips: Let Go

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Feb 15

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Friday Friendship Tips: “Just Friends”

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Mar 30

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Conceptualizing Prostitution

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Seattle skyline in focus with black wrought-iron fence in front and out of focus

Prostitution is conceptualized in a variety of different ways in modern American culture, but in this blog post I’m going to focus on what I consider the two predominant views and offer an alternative that is gaining support. I am writing about these two viewpoints not as an outsider to either, but as a former-insider to both. At various times in my life, I have held various positions on prostitution influenced by the subcultures I was part of—conservative Christianity for a few years between high school and early college, and liberal sex-positivity from late college through, more or less, today. I also will point out that obviously, there are nuances to both these positions that I am not going to be exploring. I am certainly open to comments from folks who hold one of these two positions and believe I have missed or misrepresented something about them.

The conservative view: prostitution as sin and prostitutes as sinners

Let’s start with the more conservative position, which usually comes from religious groups and those who are culturally traditional. In this view, prostitution is typically regarded as wrong or, in religious terms, sin. This viewpoint ostensibly blames both the prostitutes and the consumers of prostitution (“johns”) as equally in the wrong/sinners. But despite this theoretical stance, the reality is that within the cultural dialogue, texts, and unspoken mores, prostitutes are branded much more frequently and emphatically as sinners and there is hardly talk of the “johns” at all. The prostitute is described as a temptress, a “Jezebel,” a woman out to trap men in sin. She is the classic “bad girl,” and there is not much empathy for her, unless she wants to “turn away from her sin” (i.e. accept their victim-blaming as reality) and convert to whatever conservative or religious ideology the group believes in.

The liberal sex-positive view: moral neutrality and pure choice

The other perspective, the liberal counter-dialogue to that conservative dialogue, comes from groups that tend to describe themselves as “sex-positive” and who regard prostitution as honorable and valuable work. This group works to re-frame and rename prostitution, in an effort to reclaim it as a positive. The words “prostitute” and “prostitution” are exchanged in favor of “sex worker” and “sex work,” and the phrase “the oldest profession in the world” is frequently used to describe it. These groups rightly criticize the marginalization and hatred that comes with a “bad girl” view of the women in prostitution. They believe that the cultural disrespect and rejection of prostitution is out of date and unenlightened. They believe prostitution should be celebrated and respected just as any other career, and reject outright that any sin is taking place in the prostitution transaction.

Suffering made invisible

While I have spent portions of my life more or less believing these two different viewpoints about prostitution, both have eventually left me intellectually and ethically unsatisfied. At this point, I certainly reject out of hand the conservative conception of the prostitute as a “bad girl” who is tempting men out of her evil, dirty sinfulness. But I’ve also come to see that there is much unaddressed by the liberal view of prostitution as morally neutral or the sex-positive view of prostitution as good. Neither viewpoint adequately addresses the problems faced by women and children who are coerced and trafficked into prostitution every day.

In my senior year of high school, I read Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment for a class. One character, Sonia, is compelled to become a prostitute because of her family’s poverty. I remember being shocked and repulsed by some of my classmates referring to her actions as “sin” in subsequent class discussions. I remember the rage I felt, thinking, this young woman has been put in the impossible situation of having to watch her family starve or allow her body to be violated—how is this her sin? Part of the reason for her family’s situation is that her father spends all the family’s money on alcohol—how is this not the result of his sin? She is not sinning, she is being sinned against, by her father and any “john” who “uses her services.” But it’s not just the conservative view that comes up lacking in addressing Sonia’s abuse; the sex-positive view that prostitution is morally good or neutral, and simply one among many un-coerced choices that women make invisiblizes Sonia’s position—a position that is quite representative of the reasons women and children enter prostitution today. Sonia is neither a sinning temptress nor a woman with full agency simply choosing one among many professions available to her. And neither are the vast majority of women and children who are being prostituted today.

Feminism: a new way to conceptualize prostitution

There is a third way of conceptualizing prostitution, that neither blames the victim nor invisibilizes the suffering of the victim. This is a feminist conception that names as the problem not the prostitute but rather the society that objectifies women and creates feelings/beliefs of entitlement in men. It sees all but the smallest minority of prostituted people as persons who are being exploited and taken advantage of (sure, a very tiny percentage really do have the power to get out of it and truly choose to stay). Those of us who are feminist Christians may even still use the word sin, not to describe the behavior of the prostituted people but to describe the behavior of the pimps, the johns, and the society that allows this to continue. I plan to flesh out this viewpoint in more nuance and depth in future posts.

I will close by sharing with you that on Tuesday night I attended a community meeting of the non-profit Seattle Against Slavery. The guest speaker was Peter Qualliotine, a representative from the The Bridge Program at YouthCare. Peter discussed the work that the Bridge Program was doing in reaching out to prostituted youth on the streets of Seattle. After he was done, Robert Beiser, a representative from Seattle Against Slavery, talked about a number of ways that the organization was responding to all forms of human trafficking in this area, such as putting up educational posters at rest stops and gas stations and seeing a great response from those. I left the meeting feeling energized and hopeful that good work is being done to help the women and children who’ve been coerced into prostitution to safely get out, get treatment for PTSD or other mental illnesses, learn new career skills, and build up a network of healthy and supportive relationships.

I am not yet sure exactly how I might help with this work, but I am planning to continue to attend Seattle Against Slavery meetings when I can. And one thing I have decided to do is start blogging. This is a huge topic, with many nuances to consider, and one that cannot be addressed by simply one blog post. It’s also, I believe, an incredibly important and timely topic. So my post today is, I hope, just the first from me on this issue.

Aug 07

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Wrong Way!

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Here’s something I saw on FailBlog.org a while back, a little bit of fun for Saturday night:

Doesn’t it feel sometimes like living with a mental illness puts us out of step with the rest of the world? The good news is it’s not as true as we might think it is… and, there can be a lot of fun to be had by breaking the mold!

Jul 09

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Complete and Incomplete Forgiveness

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The following is the full text of the July edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter. Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged; do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

-Luke 6: 36-37

These words are spoken by Jesus as he is teaching his followers about how they should behave. Throughout the gospels we find Jesus sharing similar messages forgiveness. Consistently the theme is, “your heavenly Father has forgiven you, thus you must also forgive others.” The Scriptures are pretty clear that we are to forgive one another, but we find that when we actually try to make this work in our lives, it’s not a simple or easy task.

It’s pretty easy to forgive someone who has apologized, made genuine amends, and made an effort to cease any wrongdoing. But what about when the person who has hurt or harmed us refuses to acknowledge wrongdoing? We may find it painfully difficult to “forgive and forget.” We may believe that we are doing something wrong if we just can’t “let it go.”

But complete forgiveness requires repentance (changing behavior) on the part of the one who harmed us. If they refuse to apologize or stop their harmful behavior, then we can find only an incomplete forgiveness. We must accept that we have no control over their actions and we cannot force them to change. In fact, I’d advise you not to “forgive and forget” because if they haven’t repented, you don’t want to put yourself in harm’s way again!

Complete forgiveness—which we could also describe as “reconciliation”—requires a holy conversation between the harmed and the harmer. It requires that the harmer listen closely to all that the harmed has to say. It requires that the harmer sincerely apologize, make amends, and repent. It requires that the two decide together how things will be different in the future.

If you are struggling because you are stuck in an incomplete forgiveness, please be gentle with yourself. You are doing the best you can. And if you have harmed someone, please don’t use the fact that you have access to the abundant forgiveness of our Heavenly Parent as an excuse not to do the painful work of repentance and reconciliation, here and now.

All of us have been on both sides of this equation. What a wonderful world it would be if all of us committed to true reconciliation when hurt has happened between people!

May 07

Love0

Be Still?

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The following is the full text of the May edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter. Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

Be still and know that I am God
– Psalm 46:10

This well-known scripture is frequently heard in our Christian communities. It’s often used as a reminder to us not to worry, to relax and trust in God. It may be used to remind us that “God is in charge” and allow us to let go in situations where we are trying to control something that really cannot be controlled. But what does this really mean, to “be still”? I am wondering how many of us are able to really and truly be still. To be quiet—silent even!—with ourselves.

Several years ago, while I was in seminary, I went on a three-night private retreat. I saw the value in being alone with my thoughts, and planned to spend a good portion of time there in silence and prayer. What I discovered, unfortunately, was that going from “60 to 0” was quite a shock to my system. I had been so accustomed to working hard, filling my time, running from one place to the next, that to truly stop and be quiet was overwhelming. All my demons, all my fears and anxieties and other painful emotions, suddenly became unavoidable. Unequipped to deal with such a shock to my system, I left the retreat early.

As I look back on this experience of my younger self, I realize that what I needed was not to go from “60 to 0” but instead to first try going from “60 to 55” and then work from there. When we come to understand that we need to spend more time being still, it’s important to realize that the process needn’t be an overwhelming shock to our system. It can be a slow and gentle process of learning to acknowledge those demons, to simply have (rather than trying to avoid) those painful emotions.

If you are feeling the need or the Spirit’s pull to “be still,” how about taking ten or fifteen minutes each day to turn off the TV, silence the phone, and take some time to simply breathe and pay attention to what’s going on in your body. In the stillness, just breathe in and out, and check in with your heart, mind, and body. Ask yourself what sensations you are experiencing, what feelings you are having. And when you feel a painful feeling—like anger, sadness, or fear—try to just experience it rather than avoid it or talk yourself out of it.

I believe some people can do this on their own, but most will need resources of support in this process. A book I strongly recommend to those feeling the pull to learn how to “be still” is Shadows of the Heart by the Whiteheads. Another resource that can be very useful is spiritual direction or counseling, especially if you begin to feel overwhelmed or stuck. Please don’t hesitate to contact me if you need some assistance in finding resources.

The concept of being still can be scary and overwhelming, but stillness is a precious gift that God has given us. Don’t miss out on it because the demons have gotten overwhelming. There is hope. We can all know what it means to “be still and know that I am God.”

Apr 04

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Precious Dust

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The following is the full text of the April edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter. Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

This year on Ash Wednesday we were blessed to worship with our District Superintendent, Rev. Pat Simpson, who shared a sermon with us. In her sermon she confessed her “love/hate” relationship with Ash Wednesday services, and specifically with the phrasing “remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return” when the mark of ashes is placed on the foreheads of each person. I, too, have struggled with this phrasing and reflected on it after hearing her thoughtful insights about the matter. I mean, it’s really pretty morbid. And aren’t we more than just dust?

Of course it is true that one day we will die and our physical bodies will eventually decompose (or be cremated) and return to the earth. But just because it’s true doesn’t mean it’s not a depressing and morbid thought. In a society in which we psychologically beat ourselves up for being imperfect, not to mention often experiencing tremendous fear and anxiety about our eventual death, what psychological or spiritual value is there in remembering that “we are dust, and to dust we shall return”?

In asking this question, I couldn’t help thinking of something I heard in a seminary class on Spirituality, and that is that all of us are made of stardust. I know that sounds far-fetched at first, but the truth is that all the atoms, molecules, and minerals in our bodies came at some point from the explosion of a star. In fact, all of the matter in the universe is made from the same material. The matter in your body is literally stardust. From stardust your body came, and to stardust your body will return.

So the “dust” of our bodies is less like the particles floating in the air that exacerbate allergies and create a hassle to clean up, and more like all of the vibrant, beautiful, and precious creation in the whole universe. The dust of our bodies is the same “dust” that makes up the flowers in the fields, the rocky peaks of the mountains, and even the stars of galaxies our scientists have not yet discovered. To say that our bodies are made of dust is to affirm that they are made of the same stuff that makes up all of God’s sacred creation.

Each one of our bodies is completely unique, beloved, and precious. Our bodies will die, yes. And the water and compounds and minerals that make them up will return to the cycle of life. But there will never be another body—another embodied person—just like you. So during this Lenten season, as we are mindful of our mortality and our imperfections, let us not be misled into thinking that acknowledging that “we are dust” denigrates us.

Because we may be dust, but we are precious dust.

Mar 25

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Before I Die…

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Candy Chang, a public installation artist, created this beautiful art installation called “Before I Die…” in New Orleans. Here is what she has to say about it:

With a lot of support from old and new friends, I turned the side of an abandoned house in my neighborhood into a giant chalkboard where residents can write on the wall and remember what is important to them in life. Before I Die transforms neglected spaces into constructive ones where we can learn the hopes and aspirations of the people around us.

Whenever the board gets filled up, they wash it clean so more can write on it. They are documenting all answers and might release a book with them. Definitely go read the whole thing!

What I like so much about this is the opportunity it provides to reflect on our values and sense of purpose. The placement in NOLA, in the midst of so much destruction, highlights the hope that our lives still hold promise, and that we have choices to make about how we use the resources we do have.

The desires written on this project reflect our altruism; one person writes “save a life” while another writes “make a difference.” Others affirm community, such as “see my daughter graduate” while another writes “understand.” Still others are about having fun and traveling, which affirm the goodness of the world around us. Our hopes, dreams, and aspirations are all gifts from God. We often want to deny them, out of fear of failure (or sometimes, if we really look deep, we find that we are actually afraid of success!).

I strongly believe these desires come from God; I believe they are gifts that show us what our purpose is. They help us discern just who we have been created to be. The pitfall here is to get very specific with our desire. The reality of life is that sometimes our specific desires—to get married for example, or to enter a particular career—do not come to fruition. But this does not mean that God has turned away from us, that our desires are not important. What we need to do is look deeper. Was the desire for marriage the cover for the deeper desire for intimacy? For trusting relationships? For fidelity? How can these desires be manifest in other relationships besides marriage?

So, what would you write on this wall? What is the deep desire underneath that? And what does this tell you about your purpose?

Mar 14

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“What are you giving up for Lent?”

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The following is the full text of the March edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter. Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

“What are you giving up for Lent?”

When I was in high school, this question was frequently heard among my friends during Lent and in the weeks leading up to it. It was usually answered with something like meat, chocolate, caffeine, TV, or video games. I seem to have noticed a shift in my community over the last 15 years since my high school days. Folks now talk about “taking something on” for Lent, or more readily admit to not making any changes during the Lenten season whatsoever. Fewer and fewer people are giving something up, or when they do, they link it to Lent only at the beginning—they intend it to be a permanent change after Lent is over.

I’ve been reflecting on what to make of this—is this good? Neutral? Problematic? I think we can gain some insight by looking at the history of Lent. It started way back in the days of the very early Christians, who would join baptismal candidates in fasting, praying, and confessing sins in the 40 hours prior to midnight on Easter. At midnight on Easter, all the baptismal candidates would be baptized. They would be given new white garments to wear and the whole church would join in a feast afterward, filled with the delicious foods and drinks they had been fasting from.

Eventually, this period of reflection, fasting, praying, and confessing of sins—leading up to the celebration of the resurrection and new life of Easter—lengthened to 40 days. During this 40 day period (which did not, and still does not, include Sundays) Christians would fast from particular foods, such as meats (except fish) and chocolate. Sundays were (and still technically are) “feast days” where the fast is not observed.

The real value in this period of fasting is not in the specific item we refrain from, but an intentional way of reflecting on our actions, drawing closer to God, and gaining insight about the ways the Holy Spirit is nudging us to make changes. This might include giving something we love—a food item, a television show, Facebook—for the period of lent and then feasting on it when Lent is over. It might include making a change we intend to be more permanent, such as routinely flossing once a day or beginning an intentional prayer practice.

The tremendous gift of the church calendar is that it allows for times of reflection like Lent. It is also important that we accept and cherish these gifts in ways that draw us into deeper connection with God, and are not just because we feel we “should.” I invite all of us to be in prayerful consideration of how we might use this Lenten season to draw closer to God and gain deeper insight into our lives.

Mar 14

Love0

Sermon: Be… Perfect?

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Be… Perfect?

Preached at Redmond United Methodist Church on February 20th, 2011

Texts: Leviticus 19: 1-2, 9-18; Matthew 5:38-48

Click here to watch.

Feb 14

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A word of encouragement: Love

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Today is Valentine’s Day, and I wish all of you a day filled with live-giving, healing, transformational love. Let none of us be satisfied by the saccharine over-sweetness of infatuation or the self-serving pungeance of lust; let us only be satisfied by unconditional, pure, and abiding love.

I profess the religion of love,
Love is my religion and my faith.
My mother is love
My father is love
My prophet is love
My God is love
I am a child of love
I have come only to speak of love
– Jalaluddin Rumi

Feb 09

Love0

What we can learn from being sick

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The following is the full text of the February edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter. Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

I am recovering from the worst cold I’ve had in years. I’m one of those people, who, when I’m taking good care of myself, almost never gets sick. I thank my dad for those genes! But my immune system just wasn’t up to the challenge of whatever bug my husband brought home a few weeks ago.

Being sick can teach us some important lessons. In a society in which we often walk around sort of “hovering above” ourselves, sickness really brings us into our body in a new way. It’s an opportunity to pay deeper attention to our sensations and feelings, to get more in touch with our needs and be gentler with ourselves about meeting them (for example, an afternoon nap that we would chastise ourselves for normally may be a welcome friend when we’re sick).

It’s also an opportunity to allow ourselves to be cared for. Perhaps a friend runs an errand for us or picks something up for us at the drug store. Perhaps we make a visit to a doctor to make sure that clinical intervention isn’t needed. We may have to ask colleagues to take projects over at work, or family members to help us take care of children or chores. Sickness can force us to do something that most of us find very difficult: let others help us.

Sickness also reminds us of our ultimate frailty. Being human means having limitations, not being able to do everything, and certainly not always being able to do things perfectly. Sometimes when we’re well we can forget that, and we push ourselves to achieve beyond what is reasonable to expect of ourselves; sickness has a humbling quality that reminds us that ultimately, we do have limitations.

These are some beautiful gifts that sickness brings to us, whether it’s a temporary cold or a chronic illness. There is freedom in acknowledging that we can’t “do it all.” When we learn to set aside our pride to ask for help, when we learn to set reasonable goals for ourselves, when we learn to deeply listen to our bodies about what we need, there is freedom to simply be ourselves. And that is a beautiful thing, since we may not be superwomen or supermen, each one of us is a precious creation, fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139)!

My hope for myself, and for you, is that we can remember the lessons that sickness teaches us, and live by them daily, even if/when we get well.

Jan 12

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Sermon: The Word of God

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This sermon was preached originally on January 3rd, 2010, at All Pilgrims Christian Church. I preached an updated version of it on January 2nd, 2011, at Magnolia United Methodist Church. The manuscript is from the 2010 worship service, and the audio is from the 2011 worship service. As usual, I recommend listening if you are able, because vocal tone and inflection is important in the preaching event.

Audio: Word of God; January 2011 Sermon by Katie Stickney

The Word of God

Text: John 1:1-18

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being. What has come into being in him was life, and the life was the light of all people. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it.

These are the first words of the gospel of John, the only gospel that starts out with such cosmological, poetic language. The other three gospels, Matthew, Mark, and Luke, tell the story of Jesus’ life in much more down-to-earth ways. These gospels begin with stories of people doing things in the world. Some talk about Mary’s pregnancy, Jesus’ birth and early days, others include lists of Jesus’ ancestors. John begins with the cosmological language: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

If these words have a familiar ring to you, it’s probably because they also begin the first book of the Scriptures—the book of Genesis. Genesis chapter one, verse one, begins: “In the beginning when God created the heavens and the earth…” and the passage goes on to describe what God did each day of the first seven “days” of creation. Genesis starts out by saying that in the beginning God created. In the beginning, God existed. In the beginning, God simply was. John, who is attempting in this gospel reading to convey to the hearer who Jesus was, refers back to the early language of Genesis. For John believes that Jesus, being God’s son and being God himself, was always with God. John’s claim here is that the person of Christ existed always, not only during the life of the man we know as Jesus. That Christ was present back in that creation story recorded in Genesis, and even that everything came into being through him. John says: All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being.

All of the gospels tell us about the life, ministry, and love of the man Jesus. John in particular focuses on the divine nature of Jesus, on the belief that Jesus was himself fully God. Church tradition tells us that Jesus was simultaneously fully human and fully God. Frankly, in some of the other gospels, one might not even get the “fully God” part of that. It is in this book of John where the “fully God” part of Jesus’ nature is really expressed. This is who John believes that Jesus is—fully one with God in heaven, fully divine, but emptying himself of part of his divinity for a period of time to come and dwell among us on earth.

And the Word became flesh and lived among us, and we have seen his glory, the glory as of a father’s only son, full of grace and truth. This part of the passage would have been the most shocking to the original hearers of this message. In those days, that which was of the spirit and that which was of the body were sharply divided. “flesh” was the term used to describe that which was of the body, and it signaled by definition that which was devoid of God. In this category folks would put our desires, our sexuality, our hungers, and our sin. One of the primary tasks of the religious folks of this time was to try to rise above “the flesh” and be spiritual, which was synonymous with being loving, self-denying, and holy. To say that God’s Son, the Christ, took on the flesh was quite a radical thing to say. In that sense, John was disagreeing with folks who want to make this sharp distinction between the flesh and the spiritual. No, John is saying, the flesh is not something that we should try to run away from! Jesus himself came to us in the flesh so that we could better understand God’s love for us.

Better understanding God’s love for us was the primary purpose of Jesus coming to us. This is why Jesus here is referred to as the Word. Jesus’ presence with us was a way for God to communicate with us that God loves us. The Greek word used for “Word” here is logos which could be translated in many ways, including simply “word,” or speech, discourse, language, thought, reason, message, account, document, or book. All of these involve communication. All of them involve trying to convey a message from one person to another. Jesus is the Word of God and that word is Love!

Jesus demonstrated love to the people he was with. He unconditionally accepted and loved everyone around him, even when they abandoned or betrayed him, even when they were caught in sin. He even asked God to forgive those who crucified him! But his life wasn’t the only way that Jesus demonstrated God’s love for us. Just coming at all was a demonstration of this love. If Jesus was truly with God, and was God, always, then choosing to come to earth in the flesh was a choice Jesus made to limit himself. There is a term for this, which theologians like to use, called kenosis. Kenosis is the Greek word for emptiness and when used to describe Christ it means that he emptied himself of certain aspects of his divine nature in order to assume a human nature. By definition God is infinite—we can’t pin God down with language or images, because whatever we use to describe God, God is always so much more than that. By choosing to reveal Godself in a human form, God had to give up some of the infinite nature.

There are three things we need to address here in talking about Jesus emptying himself and coming to us in human form.

First, what I am describing to you here is one way of understanding the person of Jesus, and not necessarily every Christian believes these exact things. You don’t have to believe or agree with everything I’m saying here. In fact, what’s important is not so much whether this is all exactly how it happened or not, but rather the important thing is the truth this story conveys about the deep and unconditional love that God has for all of us. This story has been with us for centuries, that God became limited so that God could communicate God’s love to us.

Second, this isn’t just a pretty story. Jesus’ choice to empty himself of some of his infinite nature, some of his divine power, was not just in being alive as a human man but also in dying a human death because the “powers that be” in his culture were not able or willing to accept the truth of his message. The love Jesus demonstrated here is not just a warm fuzzy feeling. It is truly a love which is willing to experience hardship, sorrow, and pain in order for others to find ways of truly living. As John describes it, Jesus was the light shining in the darkness, and the darkness had not overcome the light—we know that, because we know that Christ is still alive and with us today. And yet Christ also did not eradicate darkness. There are still many ways we all experience darkness in our lives, and it can often be very difficult to accept the message of God’s love for us—not only because it is often hard to feel worthy of that love, but also because that love often challenges us in our comfortable places, to go out and do things that are scary or painful. The kind of love that Jesus demonstrates is the kind of love that comforts the afflicted and afflicts the comfortable… but most of us here in this room have some areas where we are afflicted and some areas where we are comfortable. God’s love is there to comfort us in areas where we are experiencing oppression and pain… but God’s love also challenges us in areas where we have gotten too comfortable or experience too much privilege. The reward, though, of accepting and responding to this healing and challenging love is that we become children of God, adopted into a heavenly family that is full to the brim of the unconditional love that all of us seek.

Third, it is important to answer the question: Why would God have to be limited to communicate God’s love in the first place? Why must there be a Word at all?

The answer to this question is simply that we are finite, embodied creatures. We have bodies that have clear boundaries. We exist in this form for only a short and finite period of time. We do have sparks of the divine in us; the Holy Spirit dwells within us, but we also experience the world in embodied ways, through touching, hearing, tasting, and seeing. Because we ourselves are embodied, we can only experience God in embodied ways. Thus God came to us in the person of Jesus as a human being that we could touch, see, and hear. While Jesus could not stay alive foreve in human form, his words were written down for future generations—that’s us!—to have something tangible to pick up and read (pick up Bible if possible).

Jesus isn’t the only Word of God. Sometimes we refer to the Bible as the Word of God. We don’t mean that the Bible contains the literal words of God, we mean that just as Jesus was a physical embodiment of God’s love, so too is the Bible. The Bible is the Word of God insofar as it provides an experience of the living God and God’s love for us. And the Word of God can be communicated through all sorts of other ways too! You don’t often hear it in these terms, but truly, wherever we encounter an embodiment of God’s love, something that stirs us change our lives for the better, to help those in need of help, to be more loving, to seek justice, that is also a Word of God. That means that music can be a Word of God. A book, whether it’s written by a Christian author or not, can be a Word of God. A website, a blog, a text message, a phone call can all be Words of God. The beauty of creation in the changing color of the leaves can be a Word of God. A pet that provides us comfort and companionship when we are lonely can be a Word of God.

And the coolest part is that this means that WE too can be Words of God for each other! I had a professor in seminary, Fr. Keith Brehob, who said, “Each of you is a sacred Word of God, spoken only once.” God spoke each of you into existence, with unique gifts, talents, and passions, and only you can love the world in the unique way that God made you to love the world. As we enter a time of silence I invite you to think about what specific ways God may be calling you to speak God’s love into the world right now. You are a sacred Word of God, and you have been created to speak God’s Word of love into the world.